If I woke up tomorrow morning only to find that by some catastrophic nuclear disaster or something I was a man instead of a woman, what would I do? Don't tell me you've never wondered what it would be like to be the opposite sex. Everybody has. And I know this not because I've talked to everybody, but because I feel that way so it stands to reason that everyone else thinks like me (don't mess with my logic). Since I'm in the mood to make lists of things I shall put my response to this question in list format.
If I woke up as a man I would....
1. Pee Standing Up - That should've been obvious. Not only because women wish they could do it, but because I always have to go to the bathroom first thing in the morning anyway.
2. Lift Something Heavy - I'd make sure to pick something I normally struggle with as a woman and see what a difference it makes being a man. I might even try a pull-up or two. I'd just have to be careful not to get carried away picking up heavy things or I'd give myself a hernia within the first 20 minutes of being a man.
3. Punch Someone in the Face - I would start a fight just to punch a guy. I'd pick a guy smaller than me of course. This is assuming that I'm transformed into a normal sized guy and not just like I am now but with a penis. If I looked like I do now as I man I should definitely stay inside or I'd be the guy getting punched in the face.
4. Drive Somewhere - I'm ordinarily a bad driver but I'm betting that my new-found penis will lead the way.
5. Get My Car Repaired - ...or pretty much any work done that requires a mechanic or carpenter or handyman. I'd be sure to get a better price and finally see what it's like to not get talked down to.
6. Try to Fix Something Myself - I just need to know if mechanical knowledge comes with the penis or if I have to upgrade for that.
7. Spend Time With My Dog - Will he become my best friend or just remain a loyal pet? 
8. See How Much Alcohol I Can Drink - Ordinarily I'm done after two glasses of wine. Can I really drink an entire six pack by myself? I could try this at pretty much any bar and not worry about some creep taking advantage of drunk me. Well, that isn't entirely true. I'd have to pay attention to the neighborhood before attempting this.
9. Grow A Beard - It'll take some time, but I think it'll be worth it. I'd try out a goatee first and move on to a full beard from there. It would be great if I had chest hair too. I'd save on coats as I'd already have natural insulation.
10. Masturbate! - You knew that was coming (pun intended). How could you not do this under the circumstances? I wouldn't go so far as to have sex though. It would just be too weird. Masturbation is a different story however.
So, what would you do if you woke up tomorrow as a member of the opposite sex?
